Have you ever thought something was just too good to be true? Everything went perfectly, but then you woke up and realized it was a dream, a little disappointed, but grounded in reality. That happened to me yesterday. Except I never woke up, because I wasn’t dreaming. Yesterday, I asked myself several times, “Is this real life?” a la David After Dentist.
So, what happened yesterday? On behalf of myself and the 37 other Blue Jays fans who were in attendance at the sold-out game at Fenway Park, I’m ecstatic to report: the underdog Jays beat the Sox 9-7. Did I mention: I was there. I felt like I was on a steady IV drip of amphetamines for 12 hours straight. More or less I was, because the brain produces its own neurotransmitters, dopamine & serotonin, that create similar physiological responses, particularly stimulation of the Central Nervous System, blah blah < /science lesson> That explains why I haven’t slept, and seriously, I got more sleep on Xmas eve than I did the night before I left for Boston.
I’m filing today under “B” for Best Day of My Life. Here is the #hashtag highlight reel, or “7 Reasons My Day Was Better Than Yours (You Sorry Boston Fan)”:
1) #BraggingRights: As the Jays were leading 7-0, I thought, “WHAT?! You mean my team is going to beat these horrible folks and their rouge hosiery?” No. Freaking. Way. The Jays’ defense was hot, and their bats were hotter. Then, the Sox rallied and put some runs on the board, and I got extremely anxious. After Frankie threw the final out, I threw my fist into the air with a ferocious yell. It was glorious.
2) #Meatsmode: I went berserk when they announced late Sunday afternoon that a certain Travis “Meats Don’t Clash” Snider was rejoining the team in Fenway for today’s game, after a recent farm stint.Then, Mr. Blue Jay Hunter declared the day an official holiday. #MeatsDontClashMonday must be my new favorite day of the week.
3) #MakingFriends: I knew things were promising when the woman next to me sang along to “O Canada.” She and her husband were visiting from Alberta and they were my buffer zone, so I was loud and proud for my Jays without worrying I would get slapped. Later, I scouted out my prodigy, a sweet little boy from upstate NY, whose mom claimed “He chose the Blue Jays! He loves them!” His older brother was a RedSox fan, so it’s obvious which son is the bad seed. Then finally, there was the gang from Waterloo, ON. Adam was totally decked out in a sweet squeaking BJ Birdie hat, Jays flags, and his Maple Leaf draped over his shoulders. (pictures to come… trapped on my camera)
4) #MakingEnemies: Boston fans who were foaming at the mouth behind me called me a “Weird Duck,” which I suppose is the Bostonian phrase for “Black Sheep?” (I still don’t understand why they don’t speak English there) They threatened my life, a little, but mostly booed me because they were upset that my solitary cheers for the Jays were louder than their entire section of RedSox fans when Ortiz was at bat.
5) #TouchingMeTouchingYou: You better believe I got down to “Sweet Caroline” at Fenway in the middle of the eighth! It wouldn’t have been a trip to Fenway without joining in this tradition. As the Jays were still pulling the lead that late in the game, not many of the Boston fans jumped out of their seats to sing along. I was fine with that, because the day was supposed to be all about me and the Jays anyways.
6) #FriesWithThat: On the bus ride back to New York, I saw a rainbow. ‘Nuff said, right?
7) #SupersizeMe: Also on the bus ride back to NYC, once the sun had set, the sky lit up. I literally had my pick on the horizon of which fireworks show I wanted to watch, It was like art camp with third graders: glitter everywhere. The abundance of fireworks was outrageous, and honestly the day could have ended with the rainbow, but I guess that would have been almost too normal for the #BestDayOfMyLife.